Texx 3 Welcome to the 3rd Annual Woody Boater Holiday Party. My name is Texx and I will be your server today. If you have a photo of your boat, or yourself, or anything you think represents how you feel this holiday season, or a comment – but you don’t know how to post it in the comment box, just send it to me at Texx@woodyboater.com and I will make sure it gets posted today.

Then come on in to the virtual cabin, pull up a stump and sit a spell.

If you’re hungry, you can grab some complimentary pigs knuckles, a few of m-fines New York deviled eggs and some all you can drink virtual beer from the virtual cooler.

If this party is anything like last year, hang on to your captains cap as the water could get a bit choppy. And watch out for that damn monkey named Fritz – he’s a troublemaker! – Texx

Everyone is here today, come on in from the cold.. wait its 60 degrees today here in Woodyboaterville. PARTY outside!  We see that mfine is bringing a keg of whiskey, Paul is broken down already on the way, so he may show up a tad late.

Kent O. Smith Jr was here already at 5 AM. Thats gonna leave a mark Kent

Kent O. Smith Jr was here already at 5 AM. Thats gonna leave a mark Kent


Larry made it! Wow!

Larry made it! Wow!


Alex is on his way!

Alex is on his way!


The Limes are set up on the sticks for the cocktails

The Limes are set up on the sticks for the cocktails


We even have Margaretas on a stick ready to go.

We even have Margaretas on a stick ready to go.


Its OK to wear a costume!

Its OK to wear a costume!


The rest room is down the hall and to the left.

The rest room is down the hall and to the left.


Oh I see Dale is here already

Oh I see Dale is here already

Please join the fun. Just keep your pictures under 1 mg or they won’t load while we all get loaded!


The boys from the International Land-Cruiser Society of America: West Michigan Chapter are now in the house – they decided to drag the Chris-Craft trailer up to the the virtual cabin for the party so they have somewhwre to stay later tonight. As you can see, they have been working overtime on those old wooden boats in Holland, MI. Free cyber beer and pigs knuckles for everyone! – Texx

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186 Responses to “The 2013 Third Annual Woody Boater Virtual Holiday Party Is OVER. GO HOME!”
  1. Mark Christensen

    I’m sitting here at work eating leftovers from our christmas party…. you guys are my respite!

  2. John Baas

    The whole gang from Wisconsin is on the way! Couldn’t get the boat out of the boathouse, tho…

    • Jack Schneiberg


      You forgot Jack in Jackson…….glide on back and pick me up please…………………..

  3. Rick

    Sorry I don’t have the music going already but I brought my staff out for a pre-WoodyBoater Party last night and we got a little carried away with the tequila shots, oh my aching head. That aside since its a virtual party just telepathically send me your music requests and I’ll have it playing in your head in no time. I’ve got my aluminum foil hat on with the wires running up to the dishes on the roof so start sending. FYI this telepathic system if off the NSA grid so don’t be shy, we’ll play the funkiest requests with no chance of blowback. If you need help to start I Googled Chris Craft music and actually came up with a hit. Not sure how they got away with trademark infringement but you can find it here.


  4. m-fine

    This little piggy is ready to go in the oven…I mean tanning booth. We will be on our way as soon as he is done.

    • Alex

      Good riddance! Those Geico ads were driving me nuts. Pretentious little swine.

  5. alfaguy

    We’ll be there, but it might be awhile … My wife can’t find the right thing to wear 🙂

  6. Greg Lewandowski

    Here for the party, Had a great run in from Michigan. Merry Christmas and a Happy Boating New Year to all our Woodyboater friends!

    Greg and Marianne

  7. Ted Grulikowski

    Happy Holidays to the entire Woodyboater universe.

    Picture of 1926 Junior Gold Cup race – Lady Helen II (powered by Miller) leading Lady Helen I (powered by Scripps F6). Boats owned by Aaron DeRoy, Detroit. Ted G.

  8. Texx

    Sorry for the delay this morning folks, I decided to hitch a ride up the hill from Woodyboaterville to the cabin with Arnold the postman and we had a minor incident when he was sorting his mail and driving at the same time. #distracted driver

    • m-fine

      I bet there were at least 10 copies of the Brass Bell in that truck that will now go undelivered.

      • Texx

        For those of you who haven’t received your Brass Bell in the mail yet, Alex will be reading excerpts from the new Brass Bell in the kitchen from 2:00 PM to 6:00 PM. Mike Mayer’s special eggnog will be served during the reading sessions.

        • Rick

          We will be broadcasting this live over our virtual radio station.WBOT located out back in the guest house

  9. Uncle Joe

    I have never been to this party before hope I’m heading the right way!!!!!!!!!

  10. Texx

    Uncle Joe – Just follow Dane Anderson, he knows the way to the Woody Boater virtual cabin.

  11. Tom Gruenauer

    Sorry I won’t be at the party. Out in the shop cleaning the 28′ Chrysler for reassembly. Have fun!!!

    • m-fine

      I like my meat rare, but those are looking a like the could use a few more minutes on the grill.

  12. Tim Loock

    Fellow Woody Boater Tim Loock just arrived from Torch Lake in his 1957 Century Resorter.

  13. steve franchini

    I’ll be there just as soon as the bottom’s done. Happy Holidays.

  14. Texx

    Tim Loock is now serving cocktails on the dock – Michigan style, from the top of his engine box. “Cocktails Anyone?”

  15. donald hardy

    Drats. We’re stuck.
    Oh, maybe we just need to pull up our ice anchor?
    Love from Brandi, Don, Harry, and the crew at McCall Boat Works, Idaho.

      • donald hardy

        It’s all real.. Life size to boot. We here in McCall, Id have a Winter Carnival. It lasts for 2 weeks. 1st week of February.
        Lots of Ice sculptures from the local business’s. Great for the Winter economy. You are all welcome to come visit and visit the busy wood boat shop here. This year we are doing a U-22 full size. All will be able to sit down and do photo shoots.

  16. Rick

    On the way out to get bigger speakers for the sound system I had a little engine issue. Matt heard that sometimes you have to throw money at a problem so here he is LITERALLY trying to fix my engine with a dollar bill. I think we needed a bigger denomination, nothing on a woody gets fixed for $1.

  17. Martin

    Sorry I can not make it today. It’s Antique Boat Centers holiday party today also. Room is running out as the hall is almost full!

  18. lee wangstad

    Just finished my daily shoveling. More nuisance snow. What is a Christmas party without vintage Santa, by outboard no less.

    • Texx

      You guys (at the Wooden Runabout Co. / International Land-Cruiser Society Chapter in Holland, Michigan) rock! Happy Holidays to everyone there.

  19. Don Vogt

    Love to join you but it is snowing and slippery in Seattle this a.m. Happy Holidays from Don Vogt and family here in Seattle. Kind of a grey day looking out towards the water, but all is well.

  20. Grant Stanfield

    Merry Christmas 1995!

    I’m late to the party..? …It’s 2013?

    Well, it was time-consuming to get all these lights strung up using my shore-power cord in the shed…Merry Christmas year after year, WoodyBoaters!

  21. Kelly Wittenauer

    Santa & Mrs. Claus will be there as soon as Rudolph finishes the waterski photo shoot. Happy Holidays to all in WoodyBoaterville!

  22. Chad

    Commander Coop will be there after his haircut. He likes to get spiffed up for the ladies.

  23. matt

    Take it away Bing!I’mmm dreaming of a mahogany christmas, booo booo booo.

    • Coop

      I thought Uncle Rick was spinning vinyl from the 60’s and 70’s?

      Try this album.

  24. Alex

    Harpo sends a gookie to all the kids Harrison’s watching over in the bouncy house. Thanks again for volunteering Paul.

  25. Wicked Wahine

    I might be a little late for the party, but save some pigs knuckles and a cold beer for me. Just have to get this boat under control.

    Merry Christmas!! to you and yours.

    Dave (You gotta luv a lapstrake) Anderson

    • Rick

      When you have too many drinks you tend to forget the order of things. Just as a refresher Step 1: Get in boat. Step2: release boat from trailer.

  26. hamster

    Bob, Chuck and Marty are on the way. But the truck is pretty slow because it is over loaded with beer.

  27. Hamster

    Hamster Holiday Fizz

    • One cup light rum
    • One cup heavy whipping cream
    • One egg
    • Six ounce’s of frozen lime-aid
    • Three table spoons of powered sugar
    • One tea spoon of orange flower water

    Pour everything into blender and fill with ice.
    Adjust sweetness and orange flavor to your taste.

    • Texx

      You’re living the good life Hamster… Always great to hear from you, where ever you are. Happy Holidays to you and yours.

      (I’ll mail you a leftover Pigs Knuckle)

  28. Dennis Mykols

    Merry Christmas to all the WoodyBoater gang, Ronnie and I got a late start, 1/4 of ice on the boat ramp this morning, but we will be there after we make a stop in Holland, mi to say hi to all the
    Water Wonderland Chapter members over at Ed Fairchild’s Restoration Shop’s big annual Christmas PARTEE !!!
    Now were is that calculator, geez, my fingers are frozen…

  29. John Rothert

    Can’t top any of those postings….

    But I did just return from GOING BOATING!

    Merry Christmas to all!

    JOhn in Va.

  30. the gruenauer brothers

    merry christmas from tom and mike
    wood or plastic jingles the same

    from keuka lake and western ny

  31. mark

    What does one do in t he winter in New England ?

    Bring the engine to the restorer of course.

    BTW – these math problems are getting harder and harder to solve !

  32. Old Salt

    In the spirit of giving this holiday season….

    You get a virtual tank of gas
    You get a virtual tank of gas
    You get a virtual tank of gas
    You get a virtual tank of gas
    You get a virtual tank of gas

  33. Coop

    Haircut – Check
    WoodyBoater Hat – Check
    Orange T-Shirt – Check
    Aqua Velva – Check

  34. Troy

    Brother Rory and his boatress Tammy should be here soon.
    If we can get him off the phone.

  35. Texx

    Some classic fiberglass guys offered to send over a Santa for the kids – unfortunately it didn’t go over very well…

  36. Bill Anderson

    Merry Xmass from Bill and Nancy Anderson,,Santa is ready even if he runs out of snow he will come by water, He is about 1/2 lit now

      • Rick

        Yep, that’s the picture I remember. I guess I shouldn’t varnish with all the windows closed. Merry Christmas.

  37. Bob Kays

    Sorry to be late, but I went to Katz’s today, then lunch with Wayne & Rice. I had to race home so my driver could pick up my date and I, she has always wanted to go to a Wood Boater party ( please don’t tell Mrs. “have I got a calendar for you! )
    Hope were not over dressed.

  38. Mark Haines

    Sorry, can’t make the party. My sleigh is getting new 5200 runners!

  39. David

    My sleigh is being pulled by one tiny “reindeer?” Not sure how long it will take to get there. My treats are running out. Mush!!!

  40. Dick Dow

    I’m trying to get there – but not sure which way to go! I really want to meet that Swedish welcoming committee…:) -Merry Christmas!

  41. Denis D

    Now let’s see, how should I arrive, Car, Boat, Airplane?
    Aw to hell with it, pass another virtual beer!

      • Denis D

        Hey Texx,

        It’s a very original California 1967 Chevelle El Camino with it’s original big block 396 motor. I’ve had it about 25 years and used it as a tow vehicle for my car trailer.

        Denis D

  42. Chris B

    just about there, me and my buddy had a few errands to run before Christmas.

  43. Texx

    Who let these guys in? Did they come in a Shepherd?

    Quick, lock the beer fridge!

    • Alex

      Don’t worry about it. MikeW got to the fridge first. As usual, all he left was the box of Arm and Hammer.

      We sent Mayer out for reinforcements.

  44. Ron Stevenson

    Wish I could be there but have to get the tree decorated tonight… of course with classic boating decorations only. (they give of a scent of old gasoline)

    Happy Holidays from Seattle!

  45. Randy Rush Captain Grumpy

    Hi everybody! Been flat out this month , no time for my Woody Buddies ! But just wanted to stop by and say Merry Christmas to all!

  46. John Baas

    Did someone say somethin about a monkey showing up? Looks like he forgot his pants! Again.

  47. Bob Kays

    Not there yet. Cruising with Cindy Crawford on a warm day, with a driver in a tux is great! Cindy and the driver thought the guy in the underwear and the beer drinking monkey were hilarious.

    • Bob Kays

      The guy in the white shirt is the bodyguard. Cindy thought the waiter carrying the varnish can with the brush was a bit sketchy.

  48. Alex

    Chad, I’d watch that monkey of yours a little more carefully. He’s been hanging with Tommy Holmes too much.

    Monkey see…

  49. Cobourg Kid

    Happy Holidays folks and may the new year bring us all sunny weather, stars at night to guide us, gentle waves, and a gentle breeze to push us when we are becalmed

  50. Tommyholm

    Who brought that mistletoe? And why is it that every time I mooch Nicole I gotta kiss mikeM? And why does he taste like monkey butt? So many questions, let’s roll

        • Tommyholm

          And when you play with the Arabian monkey you play with nonsense ……just ask Nicole, the mother of my babies…..I ride the elephant, I must rest…

  51. Brad Hill

    Oh, to be a Gar Wood at this woody time of year – or any time of year for that matter. “Cheyenne” resting comfortably in the lift. Happy Holidays!

  52. Tommyholm

    I was just chatting with Chris smith. He laid out a coat of varnish today around noon. Chris is some 90+ years old and living in holland, mi and still doing the varnish. We should all be so lucky…..happy holidays

  53. Troy

    Nephew Alex is haveing a good time, doing the infamous SELFIE.

    (Look closer at the shirt, it was Dad’s)

  54. Alex

    Woah. Didn’t anyone step out to snap a pic of tonight’s sunset? No wait. Troy got it.

    • Troy

      I may have gotten the sunset, but I bet you are the one that brought the body paint.

  55. Alex

    Is it too early for Boats and Hoes on the office PA system? Mr. Firewall, the IT policeman, passed out an hour ago.

  56. Texx

    I think (hope) the party is starting to die down now… the food has been gobbled up and the beer fridge is close to being empty. I can hear somebody out on the dock singing, not sure what that’s about… and I can’t find Alex (which is usually a bad thing).

    I just hope like Hell none of the stragglers decide to fire up a late night poker game like last year. That was a disaster with Fritz the chimp as the dealer.

    And who is this guy?

    • tommy schiltz jr.

      that’s a picture of Uncle Joseph Schiltz, my great uncle who enjoyed a beer that made Milwaukee famous. Uncle Joe had a ship and a tug boat or two before he became a Woodyboater upon felling a tree or three in Wisconsin and laying his first keel of virgin pine in Oconomowoc, Wisconsin. Uncle Joe fashioned his first runabout like a Thompson without an outboard but imagined a Volvo to push his woody across the Lake O’ Woods. Uncle Joe smoked one too many stogies and was laid to rest in Oshkosh in 1902.

  57. steve bunda

    Late to the party, had to take out my new Duck Dynasty Hat for a ride! Happy Happy Happy, OH laurie got to go too after cleaning the shop!

    • steve bunda

      sorry Jim, but we needed some protein for the long winter ! please don’t tell Santa,, Laurie

  58. Wilson Wright

    Sorry I was late…Got busy decorating the tree…thanks for the invitation….It was the best party I’ve been to all day…

  59. Rick

    Going out for more beer, taking a shortcut across the lake. Trying to be safe, we’re all wearing out PFD’s.

  60. Rick

    This is a WoodyBoater Party, no damn plastic boats, oh its just a fun way to return the empties?

  61. Brian Robinson

    I’ll get there a little later… MikeM, Texx, and I will close it out.

    • Dane


      I just pulled into the dock, so I’ll be around for a while too. ID this make and model for bonus points.

  62. John Baas

    Some of the hardier partyers are gettin’ hungry again. The Duke is here to re-kindle the BBQ pit. Rub THIS, Pilgrim!

  63. Rick

    Hey, isn’t only like morning on the west coast? Still lots of partying to do. Heck I haven’t even seen anyone wearing a lampshade yet.

  64. MikeM

    Sorry I’m late….I’ve spent the day driving to the party. Of course, I got word from Alex that MikeW drank all the beer, so I hi jacked a beer truck. Two problems….I really don’t know how to drive a semi

  65. MikeM

    And finally, Mr. holmes….you can keep the monkey but stay away from my wife. Giddy up.

    I was surprised to hear that Paul Harrison volunteered to read christmas stories to the kids. how did that go? I thought he had a restraining order on him? Oh well, party on!!

  66. Texx

    Say (or sing) goodnight Irene and lock up when you leave Mike & Brian. You are now in charge of the beer fridge and I think there are a few frozen pizzas in the ice box.

    The guys from Holland, MI might need a frozen pizza to help keep them warm in the Land Cruiser trailer (I don’t think they have a heater in that thing), so check with them please. – Texx

  67. Texx

    Oh and one more thing… I can’t find Rick and the lamp shade is gone again, so watch for him please. He seems to like closets and attics. Thanks – Texx