Yesterday we touched on the subject that classic boats on the misconception that classic boats are high maintenance. One thing said sparked a thought. I suppose all boats require maintenance, but newer generic boats of course are usually purchased by generic people, that of course want a one way relationship with there boat. Or are like parents of latch key kids. They don’t want to think about it, or even really care about it. It’s more about being a boat to party, fish or do stuff on the water. Which is fine.
But with a classic boat you can actual have a relationship. See, it’s like this, a classic boat will tell you in various ways it wants you to pay attention to her,. Needy? No, just in a conversation way. Maybe its a dull finish, or a little cough when cold, or a runny intake? All these little things are just the boat having a two way relationship with you. After all you talk to her while you are out on the water. A new boat just flicks on a light and you take it to the dealer and they make the light go away. With the classic boat, you may end up spending an afternoon with her in the boat house, loving each other while you caress her soft interior. Checking her fluids, and trying to turn her on. Messing with her spark, and polishing her knobs. All this before your wife arrives for a ride. But you know….you know, you are secretly getting that three way you have dreamed about your whole life and never pulled it off.
Yup, I went there, and if you are a gal who is reading, just change her to he? Or whatever, its all cool here, After all we are talking about boat love here! Now just a second here before you wonder if I have lost it…There is actually a point here. You we’re in a strange way able to relate. But thinking about this with a new boat, and EWW! That’s Gross.
And there ya have it! now go out into the barn and undress that Woody Goddess and talk to her, tell her you miss her, and that you should see each other this winter. Maybe tease her about her bottom? Wait, no that doesn’t work? And for gods sake if she asks if Bronze Hard Bottom Paint makes her bottom look fat? just change the subject!