I am writing this for you to send to someone that you may know that is “Wake Challenged”. You can share it on Facebook, there are a lot of Douche’s their. Okay if you are a Facebook Douche now reading this now. Turn around from time to time to see if your large ass wake is gonna cause problems with others. You know, the other people on the planet other than you. YOU DOUCHE
See, when you are out on a Summers Eve and zip around close to other boats, or your wake might just swell its way to a shore, be careful. Wait, enough being nice. HEY DOUCHE BAG! SLOW THE F&^# DOWN. That’s my varnish job you are gonna trash. And the last thing I need to do is go all Canadian on my boat.
Oh, and you little twerps in Jet Skis.. Ya, YOU! When you hit puberty, you may realize that you are not the center of the universe and YOU ARE A JR DOUCHE. Don’t be a Jr Douche.
Mr Big Ego little Weenie yacht man. REALLY? Do you know the size of that wake you are creating? No, cause your banana hammock speedo suit, with your fat greasy body flopping over it, is cutting off your blood supply to your brain. Tell your 20 year old wife to remind you.
Mr on the phone. Get off the phone and pay attention. You get to get out on your boat so few times a year, why waste it yacking on your dam phone. They will wait. By the way if you are talking to someone on their phone while on a boat, please tell them SLOW DOWN DOUCHE! Text them..
So, there ya have it, I feel better now, I wanted to get that bad juju out of my system before I went boating in Florida.. Which reminds me, your left blinker is on! I SAID YOUR BLINKER IS ON! Douche!