WoodyBoater Opens Laboratory To Save Us All From Us All.

Working 24/7 We can do this together

WoodyBoater Laboratories – WoodyBoaterville: Today it’s announced that the scientists, engineers and creative minds of WoodyBoaterville  have come together to figure out how we can all help during this historic time. We have several projects in the works and will be announcing them as they happen. Matt Smith Of Woody Boater  said  “It’s a fine line between genus and crazy. But those are the times we are in. And since my entire universe now is my sofa, and the www. Crazy ideas are all I have.” Dave VanNess, Chief Engineer Said “Ya.. that could, might, possibly, work. Thats good enough here at WoodyBoater laboratories.

Burning the Midnight 40 weight oil

Now I know our little universe here of WoodyBoaters is mostly 50-80.. BTW, We need more young people. Anyway, our citizens, our Sons Of Varnish are the perfect blend of Analog and Computerized brains. No other population in the history of mankind has this gift. An understanding of the digital universe and experience and history of machinery that runs on simple principals.

mmm? We can fix this

So in a sense, Other than the health care workers. First responders, Scientists, Financial Experts.. Okay about everyone.. we, the Sons Of Varnish could be the key to solving the worlds problem. After all, we keep boats going for over 70 years that were designed to live 5 years. We use our boats that have no computers, and run on passion. We have raised kids, and act like kids, we smell LOTS of varnish and degreasers. And yet are still alive. We buy old wood piles of wood, and are excited by it. To quote the Boatress. “Does this one at least float?”

Our Varnish Elixir has cured Cancer, Goiters, Hair Loss, And well.. You know.. THAT! Will it work? We are trying on Bilge Mice now..

We are working on dosage now.

So, what’s in the works? We have in the works, Face mask ideas, Ventilators, and innovative ways to survive being quarantined with your entire family. We will be up dating as they happen, not waiting for the early AM reports. These are special times that require special reports. That and I am stuck in front of my computer all day trying to figure out ZOOM, Google Hangouts, Basecamp, and 50 other new ways we are all keeping our work going.  STAY TUNED FOR SOME AMAZING NEW RESULTS AS THEY HAPPEN.. 

19 replies
    • CenturyMike
      CenturyMike says:

      Go easy on him, it’s kind of like patina on a copper exhaust pipe…. it enhances the story and catches your eye..

  1. Jim Staib
    Jim Staib says:

    Wisconsin starts “Safer at home” today. Although it is complicated to understand one thing is black and white. Boating related businesses are “Essential Services” and may stay open.
    Section K.
    Gas stations and businesses needed for transportation. Gas stations; auto and motorcycle supply, repair and sales; boat supply, repair, and sales; and bicycle supply, repair, and sales.
    We have closed shopping here to maintain “Social Distancing” but are open for phone and email orders.
    It is confirmed by the state “BOATING IS ESSENTIAL’

  2. Mark
    Mark says:

    One of the new symptoms is loss of sense of smell. If you cannot smell varnish any more then you might have it. Seek medical help by phone first.

  3. Neil Satterly
    Neil Satterly says:

    God help me, I can relate to this. Be careful with the elixir though. I hear too much is bad for the marriage.

  4. Mark in Ohio (sometimes da UP)
    Mark in Ohio (sometimes da UP) says:

    Happy Birthday to my son Ben today 🎂 Ben is a passionate woody Boater. He is the kind of young people needed in this hobby/passion. Here he is enjoying his 54 Penn Yan that he restored himself.

  5. John Rothert
    John Rothert says:

    I am Going Boating….soon….I hope….maybe tomorrow, weather sucks….did some varnish in a 15 mph wind….I would think I am losing it…but wonder if I ever had it?

    John in Va.

    • Larry Jamieson
      Larry Jamieson says:

      Sorry we didn’t get a chance to catch up at Sunnyland Show. Hope you are well. Are you planning on going out to Gull Lake Show in August? Glad you saw Troy and Sandy. Larry Jamieson

  6. 72Hornet
    72Hornet says:

    All good to share as we are all in the same “boat” so to speak. I’m finding solace in going to my shop each night to sand, paint, varnish and organize. It has been kind of nice to be seeing my Ski Dart get some much need love….Cheers to all as we will get through this and be together at a boat show this summer!

    • CenturyMike
      CenturyMike says:

      That’s some funny stuff right there!! Genis pure genus!! Oh yeah and jeanyas pure genius 🙂

  7. Dick Dow
    Dick Dow says:

    I suspect Matt is being a little tongue-in-cheek: “Genus” is likely referring to the shared biological trait we share in our fascination for boats and boating, -not that there is anything logical about it… My clinic is ready out here, in case it’s needed… 🙂

  8. m-fine
    m-fine says:

    My Jeannine Us idea for the day? A special offer for the woody stuff store. Buy two shirts and get a roll of toilet paper for free!

    You will sell out by Friday.

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