Why No Marina Wants Your Old Boat.

In the past year, there have been three large boats left behind in our area. And our area on the bay is a pin dot. And from time to time a random sail boat will linger in the water or run aground and left. But the three boats I am speaking…

Happy Thanksgiving To All, Except Graphtec, And Apple, Okay And Microsoft.

Happy Thanksgiving, and thanks for the fun yesterday, it did help, at least keep me laughing and not feeling alone in my hell. I had cracked the interface of Illustrator and Cut Master Jam, Okay thats what I am calling it, now the plotter…

Attack Of The Killer Bimini Top

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Okay, okay, this has taken me a day to come to grips with how funny this could be. And yet, maybe in a way, this story could help another. And yes, I am laughing now, since its both stupid and litterley a slap in the face. Or lip in this…

Custom-Craft Brochure On Ebay, But Belongs In A Certain Part Of Hell

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Well if that headline doesn't get you to read on, I am not sure what would. And why would I go on a rant about a dumb brochure? I mean it's got babes, and all sorts of vintage coolness. But, here is my issue. It's all one big rip off. Like if…

Spending Memorial Day In Berlin Germany

As I have been walking around Berlin over Memorial Day weekend in the states, it's been eye opening to see it all from the other side. And how completely senseless it is to ever want to start a war. This city is amazing, and full…

The Impact Of Artificial Intelligence On Classic Boating.

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Artificial intelligence (AI) has the potential to significantly impact the world of classic wooden boats. While some may view AI as a threat to the traditional craftsmanship and artistry that defines these boats, others see the technology…

The Real First Sign Of Spring – Dead Batteries. WHHHHHHYYYYY?

Well, I finally got up the energy to get rolling on the boats in the water thing. And CLICK. Or worse. Nuth'n. Dead Batteries. And yes I know, Trickle charge yada yada, and yes, the batteries were not on.  BUT, in my way of helping folks,…

The Other Side Of The Story

The other day, I removed a negative comment from the comment area. I was taken to task for doing so, and for the 5 minutes it was live, it was amplified and now, I am involved with it and needed to address it. So, with an open comment section,…

The Summer Is Getting Away From Us – Get Out There!

Not sure if you have looked at the calendar yet, but its almost August, and dang that went by fast. Kinda like a good movie, or binging Breaking Bad. Its goes fast, while winter lingers on like any clock in a class room. You know the one…

Happy Daughter “In Love” Day.

This year at the age of 63, I became a father again.  As you may recall we had a wedding here at the Global HQ. And of course I am fully aware of the formal nature of such a thing. The father in law thing. But what I did not expect, emotionally…

Door Is Open, Beer Is In The Fridge. Have Fun Today.

You may have noticed. Or not, I am late this morning for the daily story. Okay, I did. I have been spinng a little too many plates lately and now paying the price for it all. Sleep. And a general daze. And thinking of a story is one of those…

Cynic Charlie Leaves A Glass Half Full Comment Worth Not Reading.

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In yesterdays story Woody Boater Cynic Charlie left a comment that sadly rings kinda true, True if you see the world falling apart, and adopt the "Kids these days view of the universe" Here it is regarding the 25 Continental for sale feature. "Cheer…

Some Self Indulgent Thoughts. Thank You, And Bite Me!

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First, thank you for humoring me and my life inside the painting I call the Railway. I have discovered that in an odd way, I am literally doing a painting, a work of art, in 3D and sometimes I am inside the painting, part of the painting,…

Take the Channel Less Traveled

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Since we are among "friends" here or co conspirators, brothers, sisters, yada yada. We can talk. One of the leading statements I always get about my boat love. " I sure love those boats, but they sure are a lotta work" Or any other statement…

A Grain Of Thought – Should We Reconsider Judging Rules?

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First, isn't it great that we are arguing about boats again, and not vaccines and masks? Yes! Like a good family squabble. And I thank all the folks that teamed up to make the Red Cobra Red again. Now, let's get a little deeper into the…

It’s Squirrel Saturday. It’s A New Thing. I Think? Maybe Not?

It's that time of year when you think you have all sorts of time to get things done, and BAM its 20 outside so you are forced to shift gears and focus on other things, then its 50 and you want to take advantage of the warm weather. All this…

You Know You Want It, But Won’t Once You Get It.

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I have owned way to many cars, boats and other stuff. I loved it all, and then for whatever reason sold it. The key word here is "It." They are just things. And in many cases these things are dreams you had, and visions that once you achieve…

It’s Official, We Don’t Need More Young People Anymore?

My email was on overdrive yesterday from pals sending me this Rob Report article on Young people snapping up Vintage Wooden Boats. Link at bottom of the story. So if you want to skip my missspelled babblethon, scroll down. Then scroll past…

A Huge Thanks For Your Donations. WARNING: And A Rant For Warren.

When I started writing yesterdays story I was just talking about spelling and little issues of Woody Boater that always seem to be broken. I DID NOT INTEND TO MAKE IT A DONATE DAY. But it did, and was very nice. Actually emotional for me.…

A Look In The Mirror. Oh GAD ZOOKS!

Yesterday I had a classic rant about our community. It came off as finger pointing at the CCABC. Well, I am not so KAREN that I am not willing to look in the mirror. Oh, not me personally, I cant handle that. But as Woody Boater. Woody…

RANT ALERT: Technical Help, It’s Needed For All.

I was on the phone yesterday with Bill Basler for about an hr, and we were reminiscing about when and why Woody Boater started and the way it worked WITH the CCABC. You may be surprised by our family connection. Originally the Boat…

Opening Pandora’s Stuffing Box! A True Horror In The Bilge Story.

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WARNING: If you are prone to blacking out looking at graphic images, you may want to sit today out. like a can of worms opened up and exploded in your face.  DON'T GO INTO THE HOUSE!!!!!!! So... Let's go back in time. About two days…

It’s October, It’s Friday, And It’s Sausage, And I Need Help..Center?

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The fall colors are starting to come out here in Virginia. Dang nabbit it happens fast. Summers seem to just fly by. Like green eyed horsefly by. I am still using my Last Car Free Day as the last gasp for 2021, but who knows. We may have…

Why Going Woody Boating This Weekend Is Important.

This year, marks 20 years of living under the cloud of terrorism. Tomorrow, the 11th is a day I personally will never forget, nor will any of you. How do we honor that day? This weekend? Do we go to church, be sad? Stay indoors. NO! That…

Is Gull Lake The New Lake Tahoe Event?

What a week of fantastic photos and copy. Steve, Dane and Texx did an amazing job, Too amazing frankly. I can now see how far I have slipped into the dirge of daily posts about the Railway, Mr B and other things with in my field of pandemic…

Are Horace and Dim Responsible For Boat Shows Being Canceled? RED FLAG!

If you are a regular comment reader, you know who Horice is. BTW, Horice could be a bunch of different people, using the Horace name to rant. BTW, this last one was very well written and made me laugh, so it may have been a different Horace.…

Tips To All Our New England Fellow Woody Boaters.

As someone that deals with hurricanes on a semi regular basis, my heart goes out to you all up there. Hopefully here all of us that experience this can help you feel better and a tad bit more prepared and weed through the news hype. Here…

A Sea Doo Pontoon Boat? Is It A Boat? Or A Variant?

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No! No! No! This is what happens when you don't vaccinate your Jet Ski, and Pontoon boat. THIS! THIS! THIS! I hope you all are happy! All of you that own these and go out "un protected boating" this is what happens. WTH!!!! Now we have to…

This Weekend Get The Heck Outta Here, There, Anywhere!

This weekend's weather is supposed to be perfect for boating around here in the Mid Atlantic. So of course it must be that way across the planet... right? Right? Ya, I know, but here it's supposed to be low humidity and 80. So, you know…

Are We A Hobby? Or Sport? Again!

This is a little something that has noodled my noodle for years. I think I have even done stories on it. I am scratching my noodle about it. Regardless, of the past. We now have a printed proof that in fact it is a SPORT! The term hobby…

Kim Kardashian Puts Her Famous Butt Cheeks on A Woody.

Well? Ya, What more can I say? If you are offended I am sorry, that's in YOUR head.  A huge thanks to Bob Kays for finding this image. Or did the image find Bob? That's all I have today. Do we really need more to launch the comment section? …

It’s One Of Those Days In Woodyboaterville.

I have written 3 stories today and they are all duds. Either bitter, boring, or one that has no link to forward you too. UGH. I have been up since 5AM producing crap, and you know how low the bar is here. LOW.. I do have a very cool story…

I Am Not Going Boating This Weekend.

It's the big weekend July 4th, and sadly even though I own 5 boats, and 8 docks, the idea of being out on the water with all the crazy's is not a good idea. Boating is a calming escape from the crazyness of humanity. And lately it's gotten…

Punch It Margaret!

First, Happy Memorial Day Weekend! The start of it all, and a humble reminder of the freedom we all are blessed with thanks to the brave souls that keep us free to enjoy weekends like this. Personal sacrifice for others is an amazing thing.…

Look’n For A Mrs B? For Some Mini B’s, B-letts? Lil B’s, Bsters.

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Okay, before read on. Know that this is nuts, borderline crazy, insane, potentially offensive, and could be this years story of the year. So.. READ ON.. Mr B is look'n for some love! And well, before we.. you know.. Tutor him. I thought,…

Results From This Weeks Bitch Fest

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Well, that sure was an interesting and engaging week. And of course like anything on the internet, just alot of back and forth but no real conclusions. But I did detect some trends. For better or worse, you are kinda are a focus group, and…

Watching Plywood Age! Oh It’s A Thing. Squirrel? Where?

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I left Sweet Pea sitting at The Palm Gardens so if you need an extra restroom, she is all yours! No Boom Booms please. Oh and if you are confused by this please refer to yesterday's story. Anyway, I ran home to the railway to watch my plywood…

And The Winner Of The Contest Contest, Contest Of Best Excuse For Another Boat Is….

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"Honey, I was thinking we should have another baby." Chad Durren comes through with a all in strategy. And I mean all in. Chad throws caution into the wind and plays the more children card. WOW! I mean this is on next level ship! Its so…

Distractions In Woodyboaterville.

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I know to many of you, all you want from me is boats, boats and more boats. Me too! BTW, not #MeToo, me as well. But also life in Woodyboaterville does not just run on Varnish and Mahogany alone! WHAAAAAAAAAT? Ya, I am distracted by many…

What To Do If Reading WoodyBoater Pisses You Off?

It seems lately we have been pissing folks off. Okay, maybe not we, maybe me. I will add, that this sort of thing brings me great pleasure, and more importantly, clicks. From time to time, not all the time, you all LOVE some good drama. It…

10 Signs You Are A True Woody Boater.

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Since I got into classic Woody Boats, I have noticed a shift in my attitude to the passion. I am far more relaxed and enjoy the enjoyment of it all. One could say, I am more in tune with the attitude of the folks that owned them first. They…

Maybe A Boat Ride Could Save Us All From Us All.

Well, this is all coming to a climatic moment tomorrow. Regardless of who wins, sadly we are all going to lose. Most of DC is boarded up expecting the worst, and most metropolitan areas are on guard. We are a country sadly divided. So, in…

A Shameless Plug For What I Am Most Proud About. Just One Click Is All I Ask.

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Sorry, today is being hijacked by my kids. I am so proud of them and what they are doing and surviving the pandemic with passion and hard work. You may have noticed the banner LOWTIMERS on the site. That's their company in New Orleans. Talk…

I Had A Dream.. Last Night.

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Sorry for the late story, I over slept. Too much Chinese food last night. BUT, that Hunan Chicken gave me the gift of joy all night. I was at a boat show. YUP, it's been so long I literally had a dream that I was at a huge boat show. THE…

I Used To Like Labor Day Weekend.

One of the side effects of being in an endless summer like we are this year, is now weekend is special anymore. It's just all one more day mushed up in warm days, sunny days, cool days and so on. And now well, if you watch the news, or don't…

Prepping For Another 2020 Gift

Let's see, Pandemic, Murder Hornets, and now a Hurricane. Oh and Regis passed away... AHHHHHHHH! I have a screw loose for sure. NO REALLY, tons of them on old dock boards. The Generator has not been started in a year. The one good thing…

Why Am I So Pissed About The Tahoe Maritime Museum Closing?

By now the closing of the Tahoe Maritime Museum is old news. The boats are headed to auction on Bring A Trailer. I suppose thats a great place for the auction to be less filled with "the tricks of the auction trade" And out there for everyone…

Picking A Classic Boat For Your Family? Try This.

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A hug! Thats right, our woody boats have something many new boats don't have. A SOUL! Thats right. I aint nuts. Okay, I am nuts. Each boat even made on the same day by the same people are unique. They feel different, and behave differently.…