Should Your Woody Boat Have The Same Legal Rights As You?


We are family!

I know. Did that crank the other day hit Matt in the head? New Puppy sleep deprivation? No.. But I bet that by the end of this story, you may agree. So I am not nuts…ish. Let’s start with the fact that our Wood boats are created from a living organism. Wood. It breaths, it drinks, and moves. It was grown on our planet with us as a living thing. In fact, it was here before us humans. Hey, just saying.

We are one with the woods – Photo Shaun Fenn

This is all about perspective. We, as a fellow being  put the wood to work, by cutting it, and shaping it. Your boat was CREATED. And given an alternative life.  BTW, just like you.. You were “created” Now your boat is  a life on earth. Your woody boat has emotion, feelings, and a job. And should have rights.  Some trees have rights. Okay, it’s a reach, but think about how this might effect the way we live with our Woody Boats?  Could you be fined for neglecting your woody boat? Could your boat be taken away to Woodyboat protective services? Abuse? Locked up in a garage its entire life? Left outdoors? When you pass a boat in a yard left for years, do you get angry? See? You dont get angry at a pile of dirt neglected? mmmm, starting to see my point arnt you?

Old Woody Boater T shirt

And to take it further, can you own a living being? Isn’t it a form of slavery to OWN a woody boat? Caretaker, Support Human? Should restorers be “Life Restorers? Doctors of Woodyness? Varnish is now essential oils? Skin care? Mechanics are now Doctors, laugh all you want, because laughter is based on a truth. Even if its a sad truth. Some of us humans care, and some are ready to emancipate their forgotten boats. Some have been left in Old Boats Homes and only visited out of guilt.


Any good lawyers here? okay, maybe not so good lawyers? Okay, maybe a lawyer that has no reputation left and wants to be known as the wack job for Wood Boat rights? They will all point, until you win! Then ship gets real? Who’s with me?

16 replies
  1. Troy in ANE
    Troy in ANE says:

    Yesterday I commented that I slept thru Friday, with this story I am beginning to think I must have slept thru the rest of December. It sounds like it must be the middle of January.

    On a good note today (and tomorrow it seems) are the shortest days of the year. Here in the ANE sunrise is 7:09, sunset 4:03. By Tuesday we will have two more minutes of daylight.

  2. Mark in Ohio (sometimes da UP)
    Mark in Ohio (sometimes da UP) says:

    Matt. Why didn’t I get any of that good $h!t you had at the Christmas Party? You seem to still be enjoying the buzz😃

  3. m-fine
    m-fine says:

    I definitely agree with you. At least the part where you say that you are nuts! 😀

    Only 452 days until Dora!

    • Dennis Mykols
      Dennis Mykols says:

      yep, I agree! At my age losing the whole year of 2020 and I can not get it back is very concerning to me…
      We look forward to spending our senior years traveling, sightseeing all the places we have heard about, and then everything is frozen.
      God bless all of my older WoodyBoater friends, stay healthy and positive in life.

  4. Don Vogt
    Don Vogt says:

    To be technical, you are suggesting that boats be considered juridical entities. Actually ships are for certain purposes in admiralty law. I have now exhausted my knowledge on this subject.

    Animals have rights too (remember cruelty to animals law, for example.)

    Not sure where you want to go with this. Probably won’t get you very far. There have been various efforts starting in the late ‘60’s, with the onset of the environmental movement, to argue for the extension of rights to inanimate objects without much success.

    I think a better idea is for you to just endow a foundation for the purpose of rescuing wayward boats!

  5. Russ in Bolton
    Russ in Bolton says:

    I have a friend, “Walkingroot”, who talks to trees. After reading in Smithsonian Magazine that trees talk to each other, I asked her what’s crackalackin’ when she’s walking by any Xmas tree lots. She says the trees communicated they were happy to have fulfilled their life function by making people happy during the Xmas season…

  6. John Rothert
    John Rothert says:

    you bit off too big a chunk of the universe for me today….
    If it will stop raining I think I will Go Boating….

    John in Va

    • Troy in ANE
      Troy in ANE says:

      Be careful how far you take this stuff. You may be mandated to stop mowing your lawn as the grass has rights and you are hurting a living organism.

  7. Bill & Linda
    Bill & Linda says:

    Maybe, on those days when there is nothing worth writing about…….no good boat pictures worth posting…….it would be OK to just do…… nothing. Until some day when there is something worth posting. Maybe ?

    • Reddog
      Reddog says:

      Mr O. I hope you don’t own that cat anymore?
      ….About Bill & Linda’s comment. What about just reposting some of the original stories from the olden days of Woodyboater. What year did you start writing this website?

  8. Mr."O"'s Boat Scratching Service
    Mr."O"'s Boat Scratching Service says:

    I’m Mr.”O” ,the cat!My slave,(owner) will be living in a sandpaper house when I’m done.He’ll have to build another boat to get all the sandpaper wallpaper.So buy stock in the sandpaper companies soon.

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