Live, No, Really Alive From An ER In Livingston New Jersey!


MRI, CAT SCAN Fun We need to invent a MRI for wood boats!

Well, the test of all tests happened last night while on a scout for a shoot at one of my clients. I collapsed. At a Hospital planning a TV shoot. One would think that if you are going down, that the place to do it. And YES is the answer. I was whisked into the ER and a battery of tests were performed. Because when you are a 50+ guy, and start having issues breathing, passing out and well… puking all over the place, it could be many horrible things. NO, not to much Varnish fumes BTW. I asked. I had visited Katzs Marina yesterday to see WECATCHEM since I was so close. Maybe?


She is stripped, LIKE ME RIGHT NOW, and having small issues repaired.. LIKE ME RIGHT NOW!

Anyway, here I am in some sort of room under observation and all my vitals are good. Turns out to be Vertigo and it hit me like a ton of bricks.


Dinner, after loosing my lunch and breakfast, and last nights dinner. BTW, the Soup was very good.


Woody Boater HQ! 2 AM

The staff here at RWJ Barnibus is AMAZING! And once you stop with the Vertigo stuff, they still need to do tests. Which all seem to be going OK. The real test though was and is. What in the hell do I talk about on Woody Boater? And so here we are. Me sitting in my undies, in my Hospital gown, and trying to some how connect a night in the ER with classic boats. Anyone? BTW, the darker the humor the better. Laughter after all is the best medicine!


Law and Oder marathon!

UPDATE, Was released and now in Hilton… Still in my Undies but well and going to drive home to Virginia. I need a boat ride!

55 replies
  1. Troy in ANE
    Troy in ANE says:

    For vertigo there is a thing called the Epley Maneuver. It is a very tricky twist of the head and swing of the body to dislodge calcium deposits that have settled in the inner ear.

    The WoodyBoater version of this maneuver is known as a Hang-On, Hair Pin, or High Speed turn.

    Here Charlie Hippler shows us how to perform such a task. Photo by Kent O. Smith Jr.

    Hope you are feeling better!

  2. FranknStein
    FranknStein says:

    Hope you’re feeling better….I appreciated the “undies” references as I am perplexed by hospitals insistence to give them up. OK my shoulder is pretty far from down there….Why do I have to relinquish my “undies”? Same thing for a simple foot surgery…or is this all a ploy to start a new line of WoodyBoater Boxers via subliminal messaging? You Marketing Guys are quite creative ….. “Dont Give of the Ship/Undies?”

    Be Well and keep entertaining us, as you do. BTW Vertigo would be a good boat name…

  3. Greg Lewandowski
    Greg Lewandowski says:

    So glad it turned out to be OK. When vertigo hit me a couple years ago, my doctor diagnosed it over the phone. He told me to try the exercises Troy suggested for a couple of days, and if that did not work he would get me an appointment with a “dizzy doctor”. Fortunately the exercise worked and it never came back. That stuff is no fun.

  4. Ed F.
    Ed F. says:

    What a guy! In the ER and worried about entertaining Woodyboaters. If you have a note from your doctor it would be ok to be absent one day. But only one day. We could tune into woody boater reruns for one day. Take of yourself and thanks for all you do.

  5. Bob B
    Bob B says:

    Ouch! I was at Katz yesterday morning. Met Alan(sp?), a super guy I could talk to all day long.

    Saw naked WECATCHUM and other boats now covered in my drool. But, didn’t see any germs.
    Get well quickly.
    Bob B.

  6. Wudzgud
    Wudzgud says:

    Hey, Vertigo is a Hitchcock movie starring Jimmy Stewart and Kim Novak. See these doctors just don’t listen. You said you went to go see Wecatchem earlier. You, my friend, had a bad case of separation anxiety from your mistress. And I didn’t charge you a ton of money or make you sit in your undies to give you that little tid bit of information. You should have immediately gone and take two sniffs of Varnish and looked at that naked picture of her and you would have been just fine. WOOOHOOO!
    All kidding aside, 50 plus, do all the tests, have everything checked out. The Boatress and all of us WoodieBoaters out here in Woodyboaterville want you around for a long time. Do some reruns from the archives for a while. Take a break and smell the Varnish. I hope you are feeling better!

  7. Walt
    Walt says:

    Let’s see, you went and saw your beloved WECATCHUM naked and then you got dizzy. It was either dizziness caused by concern about making it to Florida in a couple of months of dizziness from the thought of what that is costing you. Seems like a likely scenario to me.

  8. Wilson
    Wilson says:

    Wow !..Glad every thing seems okay today….but how does one do a Woody Boater issue from a hospital bed ?…You are quite a guy. Take care.

  9. Jim Staib
    Jim Staib says:

    At 50++ my doc calls me and asks when I want my physical. Pretty sure it is related to his kids in college. Just do it! Got a lot of issues straightened out. it’s down to him telling me I’m fat.
    After reading the chain of events, my amateur opinion is it was a delayed reaction to seeing your bill while at Katz’s.
    Just remember you have been here for us for years. We are pulling for you.

  10. Stephen Fowler
    Stephen Fowler says:

    Proof that too many woodies is tough on a guy 50+

    Wait, can I say that here?

    Glad you are ok, better get well soon, Lake Dora is less than 40 days away.

  11. WoodyGal
    WoodyGal says:

    Dang! They let you keep yer underware? Perfect timing to be cremated & added to Wecatchums varnish! Dark humor aside, we would all be lost without our WB fix.

  12. John Rothert
    John Rothert says:

    I can give you the boat ride tomorrow at the Deltaville Maritime Museum gathering of the Tidewater Chapter ACBS….where you are scheduled to speak….
    Take care and don’t push it…..
    John in Va.

  13. Keith Colonna
    Keith Colonna says:

    Prepare yourself for the next fainting and nausea…when you get your hospital bill.
    I had a similar faux heart attack a couple of years ago which turned out to be chest cramps from a potassium deficiency. My bill for an overnight was $10,000, with all the tests…and the food was not that great. Fortunately my insurance covered every penny.

  14. TommyHolm
    TommyHolm says:

    Did you show your Woody to the nurses? “Nurse my ear hurts” , patient. “show me your junk”, nurse. Best part of being in the hospital, showing off.

  15. Charles J
    Charles J says:

    Matt – Sorry to hear, vertigo is no fun, get well soon. I think we can all ageee, we’re glad you didn’t feel the need to show us your stripped down deck like that of WECATCHEM. 🙂

  16. floyd r turbo
    floyd r turbo says:

    I’ve got you beat on the hospital bill…Alayna’s 7 week stay in ICU $931,643.53. That doesn’t include the specialists doctors bill (infectious disease Dr., heart specialist, lung specialist, kidney group, liver specialist, gastroenterologist specialist, neurologist, occupational therapist, and physical therapist). But the good news is she was back on the radio last Friday doing the show she produces at Georgia State and will be moving back to her apartment and finishing her last semester at Ga State.

  17. mike gruenauer
    mike gruenauer says:

    hope your doing better. i have vertigo no fun!!
    jan 20th you had a 4 foot model of a CC cruiser
    for sale for 2000.
    i found one in an antque shop for 500.00
    i included pics if any one is interested let me know

    • floyd r turbo
      floyd r turbo says:

      Funny that you speak of vertigo and your image is upside down unless you right click on pic to view image.

      • Matt
        Matt says:

        HA, its flipped over for a new bottom! Thanks everyone for your fun jokes. I got up a little late this morning, and felt much better. Worn out, but not vertigoing! I did get going home though to DC and later today down to Reedville and tomorrow giving a fun talk to a gang of ACBSers in Deltaville. All part of the fun!

  18. Tuobanur
    Tuobanur says:

    All joking aside, I realized (not soon enough) part way through varnishing my boat that the fumes from the varnish gave me the same symptoms as vertigo, it was horrible. Once I started using a good respirator and not hanging out in the shop after varnishing, no more problems, I also realized a few years back that certain wood dust would do the same thing, one of those woods being Poplar.
    A little herb also helps the vertigo… 😀

  19. Don Palmer
    Don Palmer says:

    I feel your pain Matt. I am a (very young acting) 66 and I had the same thing happen to me about 10 days ago. It was a quick trip to the emergency room. I had a miserable night, but fortunately it was just for one night.
    I hope it never happens again… to either of us!
    Thanks for your report.

  20. floyd r turbo
    floyd r turbo says:

    The holistic solution suggested by Troy does work – I’ve tried it after I collapsed in the medical tent on day 3 of my 400 mile Bike Maine trip when the temps dropped from 82 to 46 at night and I didn’t hydrate properly which triggered the event. The subsequent 30 mile $1,800 ambulance trip to ER for IV and diagnosis was denied payment by insurance of course. Another battle we had to fight. Good luck and it took a few days for my recovery although I got back on the bike to finish the trip, I was a little groggy for a few days. Not sure if it was the effects of dehydration or vertigo “adjustment”.

    • floyd r turbo
      floyd r turbo says:

      By the way, the medical “solution” is to prescribe a drug of course. The prescription is for something similar to Dramamine that slows you down and causes drowsiness somewhat but is not a cure. I told the Dr I’m riding a 400 mile bike trip, I can’t slow down, he said I didn’t have to take it. When i returned to camp site other riders told me about the solution Troy recommended which I tried and worked. So for those of you who may have dizzy spells when lying on your back in the bilge after getting back up on your feet, you might try this solution. I had been to my regular Dr. when this occurred years earlier when I experienced the vertigo but they could not diagnose the cause after EKG, EEG’s and other medical tests.

  21. Wolfgang
    Wolfgang says:

    Is that header photo one of the Angles you saw at the hospital? I saw some the last time they put me down. Why is it us old guys get all these tipsy things? I know to much varnish may be epoxy too. Can’t figure why I itch all over. Find fun in every day and get well fast. CHEERS!

  22. Kelly Wittenauer
    Kelly Wittenauer says:

    Glad to hear you’re on the mend now. And still have never missed a day of bringing us WoodyBoater. As others have said – we can live with a few reruns if you need a break to get some well deserved rest.

  23. Cobourg Kid
    Cobourg Kid says:

    Matt jut just dropped in to see what condition your condition was in and was relived to learn that the silent cyclone had spun through your ear’s rather than than through your heart.

    Get well soon matey

  24. RiverRat
    RiverRat says:

    Dizzy? Sounds like a boat buying opportunity. Maybe you can get the Doctor to write a note. I think I was dizzy each time I have bought a boat. Scopolamine did not help. Be well.

  25. steve bunda
    steve bunda says:

    Matt, I can fix and rebuild a wood boat, I can help the wood boat produce excitement, fun, a sense of family , and memories . But to fix you it will take a higher calling . Thanks for all you do for us!

    Steve and Laurie and our extended family

  26. Capt. Slats
    Capt. Slats says:

    So Matt, what’s the Kapok rating of your hospital bed? Oh and glad you’re ok too. But seriously, if we could get back to the stuffing material. Was it a prewar or post war bed? And where are your boat slippers? I mean really Matt.

  27. Mike U
    Mike U says:

    Turn things around – wear that gown as a cape! That will get you released alot quicker. Trust me on this one.

  28. Chad
    Chad says:

    Stare into this swirly thing and slowly rotate your head in a counterclockwise direction. That should take care of it.

  29. Chip DeBoer
    Chip DeBoer says:

    A year and a half ago I was in the hospital for 4 days waiting for my triple by-pass surgery. How did you get to keep your undies? Mine dasappeared the day I was admitted….
    Glad to hear that you are doing better.

  30. Cheri
    Cheri says:

    We’ve got vertigo in common, too, Matt. Epley Maneuver is the only thing that works for me. Google it. Much less invasive than the ER, though you won’t get any jello doing it yourself.

    Feel better!

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